This Thing Called Kindness. LINK:

It's been one of those ugly days. The ones where your kids are bored, you are REALLY tired, and there is not enough coffee or TV on the planet to fix this terrible situation that is headed straight down the toilet.

So I did what I do when I'm in a rut- I ate. The good news? It was kinda healthy (home made bread with cream cheese and smoked salmon). The bad news?  I ate half a loaf and half a fish.

Needless to say, I'm now mopey with a wheat belly.

In light of this, Husband says to me tonight:
"You write a blog post almost every night. I think you should take a break tonight". I say, "I do too".

So, I battle HARD to get my kids to bed early, and it takes an extra hour. Then I feel sorry for myself some more and cruise Facebook for another hour. I figure I might feel better if I am productive. So, I start to think on some other things. Like how do I get this blog OUT there? It's making me happy, it's keeping me thinking. This is a win. But, I'd like it to potentially be a win for others too.

Then I stumble upon something I'm sure I should have probably already known about, but didn't:

www.stumbleupon.com

It's this kind of fun website (reminds me of HOT or NOT from the good old days) where you read an article, then you give it the good ol' thumbs up or down, and you move on.

Enter first article: one I have read before about making dinosaurs freak your kids out by doing random things in your house while they're sleeping. Cute, but not new. I feel generous, give it the thumbs up, and get ready to move on, but article #2 catches my attention.

It's a compilation of feel-good stories that people have submitted. Normally this makes me cringe a little because I am hard to please that way. But these are nice, simple feel good moments that we can all relate to. You know, the ones where you feel like all humanity is not lost, and there is still hope in this world.
For example (excerpt taken from website below):

1. Today, a man came in to apply at my restaurant.  He seemed charismatic, kind, knowledgeable, and friendly.  Later, when I went to call him to extend a job offer, I noticed he had written “ask for me” under his number.  The number belongs to a homeless shelter.  But I’m gonna take a risk and hire him anyways.  MMT

Enter one of those moments where it all comes together for me.
See, I've been thinking about this a lot:

If you want happiness for a lifetime, help someone else.

It's simple and it's truth. I keep thinking about how good I feel when I do something for someone else. Anything really, and mostly when there is no credit to be taken.  Then I get wrapped up in my own little reality again and off I go. I'm selfish and I know it. It's a hard habit to break!

Anyway, I'm thinking about this, and I'm thinking about this article (here it is): 

http://www.marcandangel.com/2011/07/11/25-inspiring-stories-to-make-you-smile/

Pretty much, the little stories are about small things that make people feel SO good. Creaky sleep wheels begin to turn. My goal this week is to try and think of two that I can do. Start manageable.

Sometimes it just feels like, without being completely aware of it, a movement is starting within your life...husband randomly came home with this:

Editors note, before you think I am getting toooo personal on this blog- that little packet at the top of the pic is FLOWER FOOD! And my note says "Love you girl, a little care package". 

A true example of what goes around, comes around. I'm pretty excited to start thinking of what I can do, and how I can make it a habit.  Anyone want to join me?

Motivation to Exercise. How do you Find it? Link:

Summer is not the time to start a running program.

There are exactly too many:
-BBQ's
-Treats
-Interruptions
-Other fun places I'd rather be.

That said, I am already 'in it'... and have managed to hang on for the ride!

Along the way, I've had a couple of friends ask me questions like, how did I get motivated? Where should I start? Of course, the biggest one: WHERE DO YOU FIND THE TIME?

The time. That's part of the reason I love running. I like to be efficient. Running in my mind, is one of the best bang for your buck exercises. It's quick, requires minimal equipment,  no special skills, and its QUICK. Oh yes, I said that already. I spend less than 3 hours per week running.

Getting motivated is truly the very hardest part.
I think this is a very realistic way to look at starting an exercise program:

I actually really believe in this little mantra! Figure out what you want to do! Make it official- write it down/TELL someone (this blog really helps with my own accountability; I don't want to end up being a farce!). Break it down to the details. SCHEDULE it in your life. Follow Through!

Sounds simple on paper, but I believe before this can happen there is something bigger that needs to happen- you really need to WANT it. Do you want change in your life? Do you want to work for it? Really? Are you actually prepared to work for it? If not, you probably won't be successful.

Just like anything- an addiction, a bad habit you want to kick, it takes some serious drive to change.

Some people HATE running. I believe it's a psychological game. I hate parts of it, but I think I know enough of the game to figure out how to defeat the hatred parts (except speed training, I truly HATE that).

First of all, figure out what your starting point is- a realistic one. Can you run? Start with something you're happy to do. 1km? 5km? Walk/Runs?

When I began my journey for weight loss, I was really worried about losing my motivation. So I set very Short Term Goals.  These were about 2 weeks long, and at the time, were weight goals. When I hit them, I treated myself to 100$ spent at MEC. 

This actually worked really well, because I would start shopping beforehand, and when I didn't hit the goal, it was disappointing to not be able to purchase what I was looking at! 

When finances got tight, and I had to think of something else to be the reward. I didn't want buying something to always be the answer. 

Here are some other great ideas I found:

100 Ideas To Reward Yourself

About not hitting goals: This happens! Life happens, motivation falls, sickness and injury happen. From my perspective, this is a bit of a mental game that you need to win. It's about choosing new goals or re-aligning the old ones and continuing the journey when you aren't able to achieve them. I think mostly it's about not giving up when you get to this point. 

No beating myself up this time. If I don't like the number on the scale, I'm not going to stress about it. I keep trucking and try again. Most of the time, I get a happy reminder that my efforts ARE worthwhile soon after.

SO, do you WANT it? If you're already on your journey, what motivational tips would you share? I'd love to hear them!

Here are links to a couple of get-started running plans that I believe in:

Couch to 5k Running Plan

I think this is great for moms. Quick- small time commitment, but geared for success!

Walk 5k Training Plan

A great way to get yourself out the door!

Learn to Run 10km Training Plan

I love this one. I coached a learn to run 10km for the Vancouver Sun Run when I lived in Vancouver. The sense of the accomplishment for the participants is unreal, especially since these are people who really questioned whether they were capable of doing such a thing! 

Helpful goal on this one- Vancouver Rock and Roll half marathon and Cunningham 10km Scheduled for the end of October. What a perfect goal (hint hint!). Concert at the end is included and tons of bands along the route!

If you have never run a race (and seriously, I use the word race lightly. We are ALL in it just to cross the finish line!) I really strongly suggest it. They are SO fun!

I know you don't believe me, but think good food, lots of super fun people, bands and the best one- sense of accomplishment! 

Hey... there is this other really great reason I run. I get a break from my kids!  It's a nice small request from a partner if you can- 30-60 mins, out the door and back again. I won't lie, sometimes I think about running a little further, just to get a little extra time!

It would be amazing to get a group of people together to support each other online for an upcoming run.  Food for thought?

Mom "Fails"

There are those days in your life, where it is glaringly obvious that you are trying to juggle too many balls. Yesterday morning might have been one of them.

Husband kindly carries the laundry basket down the stairs (HINT- I have no clean clothes). I start the first load. I contemplate the array of soaps sitting on top of the machine (coupon score!). I recently bought one, and am pretty sure it's irritating my son's skin, but it is a BIG expensive bottle. To use, or not to use? I've used it a handful of times already.

That's when I notice it:

Did YOU see it? No? Let me spell it out. It's "Hand Dishwashing Liquid". Disguised in a laundry sized bottle, complete with laundry lookalike cap and appropriately labelled with super fine print. Not only is this a mom fail and a marketing fail, It's also a couponing fail (so much for the stellar deal I thought that I got!!).

Enter parade of small mom fails. Burnt toast. Baby found crawling in the shower.

 Jam on the recliner. My house is messy. CONSTANT SHRIEKING, BANGING, YELLING, POLKING. Me yelling at son to stop slamming doors (this by the way, clearly makes for calmer children who don't slam doors), books hitting the back of the door after it's slammed,  making good, 'clean', healthy treats and eating 75% of them myself, Baby who is 8.5 mos old and will not eat more than 2 bites of solid food, despite trying 3 times a day, every food under the sun, every texture under the sun! Aahhh! Also, the moment I looked at the baby monitor and saw this:

UM? THERE IS NO ONE IN THERE! Thank you big brother for adjusting the camera so that it appears the crib is empty! Small heart attack adverted after racing up the stairs and finding him curled up in the corner, just out of sight.

Everyone always says that having kids is a good excuse to have a messy house, but no one ever talks about the fact that sooner or later, they STILL have to clean it. I have actually recently thought about hiring someone to do the jobs I hate, like dusting the blinds and cleaning window ledges- IE the jobs that will probably never again be accomplished in my house until I am too old or to care but apparently the government disagrees that such costs should be covered by Employment Insurance.

It occurred to me last night as I was lying in bed, that maybe I'm trying to do too much. World slowly tilting, plates I am juggling starting to slip.  But then I was too tired to really think about it!

I realized also that we as moms think that we are failing a LOT. There is judgement everywhere. For example, waiting in the grocery line: During the 16th minute and the third "NO, you may not have a Kinder Surprise", and Elderly gentleman joins the line behinds us. K responds to my NO, and gentleman shoots me a look and leaves the line behind us.  Nothing has the ability to deflate your spirit like a little disapproval.

Probably I should admit to myself that these aren't mom fails, they are mom realities, and small ones at that. My kids are alive, and aside from the time I let the little fall out of the tent trailer, I've done a pretty good job of sustaining their existence. I don't really care about what people think of my parenting, generally speaking, but on those days where sleep is in short supply, it can be a bit too much.

There are also more mom successes than fails in a day. Somehow typing the parade of mistakes makes them feel small and insignificant rather than like a mountain building in front of me. Not that these are enormous things, but a pile of them put together can feel suffocating.

One reason I wanted to start this blog was to be active in my own thoughts. When these feelings and situations arise, I want to feel in control of my own destiny to fix them, or at least deal with them. I don't appreciate or have much compassion people who live in the world of woe is me (part of my dark side perhaps); and I want to be careful not to become one of them.

A small change in attitude seems to be brewing in my mind. A little less, "What can I reasonably do" and a little more, "What is it that I actually want to achieve?" I'm trying to think beyond the limits I previously set on myself. Perhaps a few too many sleepless nights has sent me on an irrational vision quest but it does seem to feel like a good idea.

And I do know one thing: nothing puts "Mom Fails" in perspective better than a third cup of coffee!

A sample quick an easy coupon shop you could do tomorrow.

Yesterday I posted to my Facebook page how to download a couple of Canadian couponing applications to your phone or tablet to save you money.

https://www.facebook.com/pages/Moms-Quest-For-Balance/611435388976810

They are Checkout 51, Snapsaves, and Zweet.

Here is a quick photo of a coupon shop that I did this morning. I'm posting it because tomorrow is no tax day at Superstore, so you could do a pretty nice little trip here and easily get your hands on the following coupons needed.

Here is what I picked up:

NOTE: There is actually a third bottle of Tresemme, it's in the shower; the bottles are HUGE!
I paid $4.80 for ALL of this. 

Here is the breakdown:

$1.10 for each Tresemme (1.50 off coupon x3 for for each bottle from the Wal Mart Coupon book*) plus $3 off when you buy three from Checkout 51
0.49 for each Degree Deoderanat (1.00 off x 4 for each deodorant from the Wal Mart Coupon book)
FREE baby cereal - two printable coupons for $1.00 off and on sale for $0.94 smartsource.ca (not the type I use, but a nice easy way to donate to the food bank!)
FREE Cascade sample. I bought this because it was 0.49 cents and there is a 1.00 off from Checkout 51, so it actually helped pay for the other things in my shop! Even if this isn't on sale at your Superstore, it's still free.

Note the deals are also combined with really good sale prices, which is why I chose Superstore to shop at!

*The WalMart Coupon book is available in most WalMart stores right now. It's a FREE magazine that comes out around 5 times a year right beside the checkout. I took four. The person in front of me in line had 12! There are about 10 really great coupons in here!

See? Not so hard!

The Chia Jam Adventure!

So on this quest for cleaner eating, there are a few things that seem hard to get out of our diets or replace. We all have these things! Having kids definitely highlights which ones are problem areas for us. 

It is easy to buy organic fruits and veggies, local meat, substitute a few things here and there, but there are some things that seem to lurk in my cupboard no matter what.

My successful substitutions so far include coconut oil, no more refined sugars, and making my own bread 100% of the time.

I wanted to make jam, but I also didn't want it to be loaded with sugar or pectin. So I tried Chia Jam!

My verdict: It will do. It's pretty yummy, though VERY seedy. I think for the amount of time and effort that I put in, it's worth it and I'd probably do it again!

 Here's a little step by step:

Recipe:

2 1/2 lbs blackberries or any fruit for jam (2lbs if you don't plan on straining the seeds)
1/3 cup sweetener such as honey, agave, maple syrup (adjust to taste)
5/8 cup chia seeds (adjust to appropriate thickness).

* As you can see the measurements and instructions are pretty vague. This is not a *picky* process!

Step 1: 2lbs Berries cooked on medium heat approx 7 mins.

Step 2: Add 1/3 cup of Honey/Agave/Maple Syrup 

Step 3:  I strained the seeds simply because it was blackberry, and to me, they were too seedy to combine with Chia. 

Step 4: Add 5/8 cup Chia seeds (you can easily add more as necessary to produce your desired thickness. I found I needed a little more for the blackberry, most likely because I strained the seeds so it was a little runnier. 

Step 5: Simmer for another 7 mins, cool, then you can jar.

This is how much it made. In hindsight, I would have used smaller jars and made twice as many, seeing as once thawed it only lasts for a month in the fridge. 

Verdict: 

He refused to look happy for the picture, but I promise he liked it!

Note: This is a fridge/freezer jam. 1 jar will keep for approx. one month in the fridge.

The whole process only took 20-30 mins and I managed to do it without spilling any berries on the babe strapped to my chest. Success I'd say! I figure it's the kind of recipe that if we need a change halfway through the winter, I can make a quick batch from the frozen raspberry stash. Success!

What's Good for the Soul...Seeking Balance in Little Ways.

Within the last 24 hours or so, I have come to the conclusion that this blog is going to be good for my soul.

I honestly can say that I didn't expect people to relate or be interested in my journey! It is a new and incredible feeling to think about moms building a community to support each other. We all have our own communities, but I think a lot of those focus around our unique interests or children, and not simply around, our well being and taking care of eachother.

 I have realized that talking about working toward goals is probably the best thing I could have decided to do! My mind was spinning yesterday- not with the magnitude of how big I thought this could be, but how meaningful it could become. I really hope it will be good for other people too. Right now, I don't want to talk about lofty goals, but simple day to day differences I can make to balance my life.

There is something pretty special about the camaraderie of moms. It can be nice to know that no explanation is necessary for how challenging certain aspects of parenting can be. We all relate to that special polite smile we give other women or men who we don't have that camradarie with. We alllll do it, I think maybe because there are some things you just can't put into words. For example: Sleep deprivation- these are words. Those words do NOT do justice to 4 years of not sleeping through the night, or those first few weeks of bringing home a new baby! You just can't explain that to someone until they have been through it.

Ok, maybe on my mind a little bit today, so, this!

Note to self: I am not going to blog about being tired. Well, not often. BECAUSE WE ALL ARE!

Anyway, back to the camaraderie.  We are all moms who give SO much to our families and kids and there are many of us still seeking balance, or more of it. I think that's a pretty important thing to do.

Timing sometimes gives us little blessings. The first one for me, being this blog. Something to really encourage me to see that I am heading in the right direction. Next blessing: I spent the weekend in my hometown, connecting with a few friends that I don't see often, but who are SO GOOD to me.  Never enough time of course. I blundered a little and had to leave early. However, the words of encouragement about this adventure, good talks, gifts, snacks, hugs, happy kids playing  made me feel so very blessed. Then got some much needed time with my mom and aunt to talk about it all some more. I remembered something oh so very important: my best friends and family are good for my soul. Not necessarily 'Play date mom', or 'same town we live in mom' but the ones who ask "How ARE you".. and they truly mean it. Let's remember to ask each other questions about how we are doing that really matter.

This touchy feely feel-good moment got me thinking about what else grounds me.

I made a quick little list off the top of my head.

Family- close and extended
Friends- who are so amazing and supportive in all things big and small.
The beach, being outside and appreciating nature.
Running!
Remembering to be kind and thoughtful toward others and a practice being a supportive friend.

So my little goal for now is this: When I start to get in a rut, I want to think about what's good for my soul and find one or several of these things to lift me up. Maybe even add to this list.

I am thankful to know that I am not alone, and inspired to know that perhaps thinking about what is good for my soul, just might help you honour what is good for yours too.

Capture the Feeling of Runner's High and RUN with It!

I have acknowledged this topic once already... but maybe I didn't pay it full respect.

This blog was also born through a runner's high. If you haven't run, maybe you don't know what exactly I'm talking about.

What is it?
It's the moment when you actually get so caught up in what you are doing, that you feel much more powerful and capable than you normally do (or actually are).... that's why I run.

In one of those moments, I thought about cleaning house on my life- being true to myself and doing what mattered to me instead of those around me. I also thought about how, as moms, we SO often do things for everyone else and not for ourselves because it's our nature, and really, as moms, it's a role we fall into quite naturally.

So as I was imagining myself jumping off of sidewalks and doing roundhouse kicks into the sunset (I'm serious, this stuff actually occurs to me- it looks much more cool in my mind than real life, unfortunately), the idea of sharing it all out was born. 

I am inspired by moms who create community, and I wanted a chance to do the same.